In Memory of Bill Adorno - NYC Life

I grew up with Bill Adorno in the town of Bayside, a suburban area of New York City. We went to Sacred Heart Grammar School together, beginning in 1938 and graduating in 1946. Since Bill was the tallest and oldest student in the class and I the youngest and near to being the smallest, it was a natural thing for him to take me under his wing and show me how life was meant to be lived.

 Living well for Bill involved going out in the woods with his 22 rifle or bow n’ arrow, or off to Little Neck Bay (or one of many lakes) to fish and camp. The furthest lake, Lake Success, was 6 or 7 miles away --- a long distance for young boys to go. But Bill had a homemade backpack to carry his gear in, looked older than he was, and could sweet-talk my mother into letting me go with him by telling her the lake was close by, and that we didn’t have to cross any busy streets to get there.

There were some projects Bill thought we should undertake to make our camping excursions more adventurous. One of these involved building a boat to take out on the bay. For this we first had to raise 15 cents to send off for the boat plans. But once the plans came there was no money left to build the boat. Bill thought we should get paper routes to raise the money. But at age 8 or 9 we were really too young to be delivering papers.

Some time after this Bill built a raft on his own. I didn’t know he was doing this because he didn’t talk to me about it either before or afterwards. But another classmate was down at the Yacht Club the day Bill assembled the raft and launched it into Little Neck Bay. At first every thing went well with Bill paddling off towards the far shore about a mile away. But then the raft began to disintegrate with the logs moving off on their own. So Bill had to abandon ship and swim into shore.

A great story of Bill's younger days from John McIntryre

Bill and Robin

Here's a page devoted to memories of Robin and Bill.   As Chris said in a FB post, they are dancing together again.

Bill and Robin dancing at cousin's wedding in Houston

Bill encouraged Robin to experiment with photography. He even bought her one of those twin-lens reflex cameras. It is likely this photo was taken with that camera. In Saudi Arabia the family had various photo sessions.

A photo session - Bill and Robin

Robin organized several Thanksgiving camping trips for family and friends.  Below is photo from one particularly windy camping trip.

Seminole Camping State Park - Bill and Robin moving a tent

Work Life

Bill indeed worked to live and not vice versa.  He made the most of his personal time.

Several friends (of the kids) assumed Bill worked for the CIA.  I can assure you that he talked too much to be a covert operative with the CIA.

His work assignments were varied.  In Nigeria and Nepal his work involved water and waste water treatment.  In Mongolia he helped the government improve the power plants that hadn't been updated since the Soviets vacated the country.  In Jamaica he was supposed to be helping out with some sort of Typhoid epidemic recovery.

As in his personal life, his co-workers found Bill amusing.  The photo below shows part of a very large, framed award that he received while in Saudi Arabia.

A Family Affair

Bill was always striving to do things as a family.

Bill had big ideas for a family business.  He wanted the family to stick together and work together. Back in the 1980s he lobbied the family to start a "Check-a-Check" business.  He went so far as to buy the starter franchise setup with hopes that the kids get involved.  Another family business idea was to build a pyramid mausoleum in the desert somewhere.  People could buy a block in the pyramid in which to have their ashes entombed.  The pyramid would also serve as a tourist attraction.

The family was sufficiently dysfunctional that there wasn't support for such grand plans.  Bill did have more success on smaller scale family initiatives.  Below is a customized "ballot" sent to family members to join a three week trekking expedition in Nepal.



Ballot inviting Noel to Trek in Nepal in June 1986

Indeed Bill did manage to get all three adult kids on a three week trek to complete the Annapurna Circuit.   Although everyone looks like hell, the photo taken at the summit of the Thorong La pass (17,700 ft) was one of his most cherished -- an enlarged and tattered version hung in his work room for years.  The negative has long since been lost -- all that remains are a few 3x4 prints.



Bill, the "Mentor", and his three kids at Thorong La summit

Close proximity to family members was the driving reason for Bill and Von to retire to Austin, Texas.  After traveling the world on one adventure after another, I'm not sure Austin would otherwise be his top retirement location.   Barton Springs did a lot to help out.

The family together - Mt Bonnell, Austin

Literary Stuff

 

Without TV in most countries, Bill tended to read a lot and listen to BBC on the shortwave radio. 

 

His reading included classic books, the New Yorker, the Economist, the Scientific American, the Skeptical Inquirer, and one grammar book - Strunk and White's The Element of Style.  Notice the red markings.  No book was sacred.  He highlighted articles and books alike.  After he picked up Arabic, Bill tended to use the Arabic "Adorno" for marking ownership on personal belongings.

 



Red highlighting! Arghh.

Bill wanted his kids to be good writers and story tellers too.  He tried...he really tried.  Unfortunately, they weren't as prone to work at the craft.

Bill acquired the following The Annotated Alice book in Nigeria in early 1970s.  At that time he tried to bribe his kids into memorizing Lewis Carroll poems:  Jabberwocky - Justin, The Walrus and the Carpenter - Robin, and How Doth the Little Crocodile - Noel.  I'm not sure the payoff was compelling enough to the kids to really work at.

 

Bill Loved a good story teller.   He loved listening to Alistair Cooke on BBC. 

World Traveler

Bill and Von took photos of all their posts and trips.  Most are in slide format.  Many of the slides have faded over the years.   I tried to pick one or two photos for each country they lived in or visited. There are many gaps.

Exclusions include:
- Countries that Von visited but I had doubts about Bill's presence
- Countries that I couldn't identify (except two that I couldn't resist posting)
- Countries that I couldn't find photos
- Photos that were included in other posts (e.g., everything water)

The photos are not in chronological order.



The outback of outer Mongolia

Yak and herder in Nepal

Tibetan temple in Nepal

Market street in Nigeria

Walking with family in Saudi Arabian desert

Desert near Riyadh, Saudi Arabia

Camel Market - Cairo, Egypt

Not sure tribe name, but sure this is Kenya

Japan vacation when exchange rate was 360 yen to $$

Young Bill in Afghanistan

Afghanistan

Dinka tribe - Juba, South Sudan

Afghanistan

Dunno - but stunning shot

Bill crossing rope bridge in Nepal

Korea - trip without kids

DMZ -- so should we count North Korea?

Korea

I'm pretty sure this is Yangtze river in China

Nepal - Bill loved taking photos of interesting faces

Yemen

Yemen

Banyan Tree in Samoa

OMG!  Someone please explain?!? Syria? Yemen? Jordan?

Parenting

With kids off at boarding school for a good part of their childhood, Bill had to rely on letters to do his parenting.   No email.  No international phone calls (too expensive).  Mostly type written letters.  Old school typewriters until the advent of DOS-based word processors.  He was an early adopter of computers for word processing.

The following excerpts should give you the essence of his remote parenting style.

Bill not impressed with Noel's part-time job working in a dorm snack shop in Spain:

We are still here in Saudi Arabia because of your particular desire to stay in school for this year in Spain. But if you are still slinging hash, then it is hard for me, at least, to see why you should stay in Spain rather than be at home where we can put pressure on you to do your homework. We like putting the pressure on you. It is one of the satisfactions of being a parent.

Bill did do his best in the encouragement department:

Your last letter was a real winner. It impressed us all. Keep it up. You may be a writer. You have the abilities and the brain. It is up to you. You can do anything you want, but we want you to get started as soon as possible

Aren’t you interested in any music at all? I think that you have been put off by my interest, and that would be a shame if it were true. Like tennis and any of the sports you have to give it a reasonable try before you know if you are interested

I’ve been thinking. You should think about going to England the last year. First you can stay where you are if you really want, but if Robin goes to Munich with Justin, there is really no reason for you going to Spain unless it is near and dear to your heart. You could have a lot more experiences in England for a year then go to Munich for a year. By that time we will be definitely looking for a new assignment and all of you should have new ideas about where and what education you want. I really regret that I didn’t insist that you two go to England. I don’t hold this nonsense that you have to stay in one school. Get all the experiences you can while you can. You don’t know how much longer this gravy train will last.

You might think about taking dancing lessons. You would be good at that. Are you taking your Vitamin C pills? They will help you grow. That is if you are interested in growing.”

I love you and hope that you are on some sort of physical fitness program. It helps the brains and keeps you beautiful.

Noel. You are smart. I know it and so do you. And you know that I know. And I know that you know. Ya know?

Wish you would become an artist or writer or something adventuresome.

I don't recall ever completing the following assignment:

There will be a homework assignment for the holidays. We want a single sentence why you love to live in Saudi Arabia. You can enter as many sentences as you wish. But each sentence should be complete by itself. E.g., ‘I love to live in Saudi Arabia because of the great fishing opportunities.’ ‘I love to live in Saudi Arabia because I get a chance to meet such interesting people and develop my cultural horizons’. The winning sentence will get a special prize.

Tennis was a regular theme in many of his letters.  Too bad I was a total disappointment in that department.

Try to do some tennis practice, so that we can play foursome. Robin and Justin won’t have played at all so everyone will need some practice. If you get a few hours in ahead then we will all be relatively equal.  

Don’t forget to get a little practice in tennis, so we can compare serves when you get here. Mom has really been giving me hell about all my mistakes and my previous unsolicited habit of giving advice to strangers and you kids on how to serve.  

If you have changed your mind about learning tennis, then try to put some time in on the half court and put a few, very few minutes in each day throwing a soft ball overhand. Say about 25-50 tosses the first day and then stay at that till you get stronger. It is the best way for developing a strong serve. The next time would be some running and skip rope jumping. If you could do a little work for a month before you come home then Mom and I would be able to turn you into a pro tennis player.

And then there are life lessons...

I hope you are keeping the addresses of your buddies. It is one of the biggest mistakes of my life not to have maintained some sort of communication with friends in the Army and college. Even if you don’t particularly like a person it doesn’t take much effort to keep their address. You change with time. And they do too. Some of the people that I thought I was very close to turned out to be non-writers and so there was no hope of continued communications, while others turned out to have very similar interests and were writers

The other day I had to attend an EEO class. Equal Opportunities something. Well one of the main topics was the unfair treatment of women in industry. They get paid less for equal work and have more hassle than men. The chauvinistic world. That is one of the reasons that I would prefer that you girls learn about going into business for yourselves. Much better to be a buss than an employee particularly for women.

And then there are these gems that I'm not classifying...

They say that ninety percent of a person’s personality is formed before they are six. You had more energy and daring than any kid I have ever known of, so it would indicate that you will be the image of yourself when you were young. You must have your face cracking now with disgust but that is the way it is. So you might as well get used to the idea.

Hurry home before all the fun is used up. We are having all sorts of fun at a furious rate and it might be all used up by the time you get here.